WickedEye's Quotient

10/05/2007 at 21:23

Fevered Rantings

I am lying in bed, sipping Langer's Winter Blend (100% orange, pineapple, and passionfruit juice), recovering from the flu and from a terminated-rather-than-letting-it-get-terminal romantic involvement, listening to Zeppelin IV, pondering the perfidy of men and virii, and being bored out of my bloody skull. Not necessarily in that order, of course.


I cannot, in fact, decide what to think about men and romance (humans in general, really, only I'm straight, and so musing on romance tends to center around the male of the species), except that the situation seems to cause pendulation between abject buffoonery and exalted self-deception, though living in this particular greenhouse (the one containing the human race, I mean) I'm in no position to hurl any sort of stone.


And I've pretty much resolved my views on virii, Orson Scott Card aside (if you haven't read Speaker for the Dead, get off your duff and do so- it's one of the best meditations on sentience, xenobiology, scientific detachment in anthropology, and relative speciesism ever written, and also happens to be a very, very good science fiction novel). Ender Wiggin and pequeninos notwithstanding, I don't like 'em.


Boredom, however… I'm almost never bored, and I'm unused to it. I like being alone in a number of ways, and when I'm tired of being alone I can always call a friend or three and go someplace or do something, even if that something is only to call Dave, or Kristina, and tell either one that I'm bringing over a pot of tea and ginger thins or rum or coffee or whatever.


The aforementioned virii have, however, closed off that and all other options involving other people's presence- I've always had very strong views about not being around others while infectious- and so here am I, all the books in my house read, head too weak to sit up properly, eyes too glazed to watch an entire movie. Things have really burrowed through the bottom of the barrel when writing becomes a court of last resort…


What I am, in fact, doing is looking for something to ponder, and in the process writing a letter rather than an essay- though perhaps the only one of my readers who is likely to recognize this as such is Maria, Muina Colinda, wise woman and bearer of secrets. The characteristic neverending-and-yet-grammatically-correct-by-the-skin-of-their-teeth sentences, in particular, are a hallmark of our long correspondence- though, given my Bioethics' professor's comments on our most recent essay, perhaps no longer exclusive to our correspondence.


Ack. There are so many things running through my mind at the moment, any one of which would make an interesting essay topic- masculine ovoviviparity in seahorses, exploration of the Rub al'Khali, Anna Sui's bizarre 40's-and-glam-rock fall collection, the anomalous expansion of water at freezing, Maurice Bejart's choreography… but I can't settle down to any of it. Writing an essay means thinking of only one thing, and I honestly don't think my brain will tolerate that right now; if this is how people who genuinely have ADDHD feel all the time, then it's a wonder they ever get anything done at all, though I imagine with practice it might be easier to isolate and slow a particular train of thought. Then again, perhaps not, trains being notoriously unwieldy machines- and many of mine have all the weight and momentum of a Union Pacific Big Boy.


Sigh. Enough of this. My eyes are glazing and my fingers are missing key after key and maybe my body is telling me it's time to stop.


Wow. I'm actually listening to my body. Good thing there'll be a record of the date, because I won't remember it come morning…

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Blogger Calladus said...

When you want a book, and can't leave your house to get one... bring one to you via the net.

www.baen.com - very good contemporary SciFi and Fantasy.

www.manybooks.net - lots and lots of books no longer protected by copyright. They have "Little Fuzzies" by H. Beam Piper if you want to feel good, or all of H.P. Lovecraft if you don't.

Of course it is kinda hard to curl up in bed with a good laptop to read - but sometimes needs must.  

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Blogger Scientiae said...

*grins* Needs must indeed- I typed the entry while in bed too. Thanks for the recs, Cal- I checked both sites and they're fantastic. I had no idea there was anywhere on the net you could get Lovecraft for free, and some of the Baen books look really promising as well.

Thanks for saving me from perishing of boredom- wouldn't that be embarrassing, after having survived the flu...  

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Blogger Calladus said...

It's always a pleasure.
And don't forget the willow bark tea!  

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Blogger Scientiae said...

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Blogger Scientiae said...

...And your home state? If you want to comment here, J, it would be more courteous to do so under your own name.

I don't want to write on Al Gore- my understanding and appreciation of the NPP means that my commenting on one won for this sort of campaign would be like an engineer commenting on the winner of the Pulitzer for Poetry: unappreciative and underinformed.

However, my friend Cal has a great entry on it up here: http://calladus.blogspot.com/2007/10/denial-of-climate-change.html  

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